One of the first things I decided to do in my new life was to get a hair cut. I have really strong feelings about my hair and when I go through big changes one of my first instincts is to cut my hair. Whether it’s after a break-up, or as a celebration for finishing something or in anticipation of a big adventure it’s always about the hair.
I have had lots of different styles over the years; shaved, bob, long, lots of layers, fringe, no fringe. I’ve never been afraid to make a big change. In my experience people often judge you based on the your appearance and for me hair is a big part of that so it’s important to me for this process to start with a hair style that reflects how I’m feeling about myself and my life.
I decided not to skimp for this one, usually I try to get away with spending as little as possible on things but given that this was the start of an important journey I would go all out. I spent 3 hours in the salon and quite a lot of money but this is the result:
I’m really pleased with the result. It still looks pretty, still business-as-usual but there is a secret undercut that makes it feel much more alternative and arty. Just like me it can pretend to be all business on the top but it’s really ninja bohemian underneath.
Today is day 4 of my retirement and I am still floating around trying to make sense of it all. I have not created anything of note yet (unless you count this blog). I’ve had a lot of coffee with people and I’m trying to set some things up but I’m also trying to be gentle to myself. I’ve had a really rough time the last 6 months, I’ve felt burned out, chewed up and used up by my job and my studies and I just want to have a rest from all of that pressure. Today I also finished my last assignment for the semester. There is officially nothing holding me to my old life! I don’t know whether to be exhilarated or apprehensive or both.
I made a list of things that I’m going to try and from this work out what projects I want to focus my energy on. The list is as follows:
- blogging; and
- playing music.
I spent this afternoon learning a couple of songs on my guitar and singing along. It felt really awesome just to get back in touch with some musicality. I’m pleased by the fact that when playing chords on the guitar I am able to sing at the same time, I can’t do that with the bass, I guess it uses up too much brain space.
I’m feeling really good about the decision to remove myself from the daily grind. I think that it’s where I need to be right now. I’m very thankful for the support of my friends and family – it’s important to me that they understand how important it is that I use this time to get in touch with my authentic self. I don’t expect it to be an easy process, brains are sneaky creatures that don’t like change, I expect to catch myself slipping back into bad habits, but that’s ok. In time I will settle into a new routine and I hope that it can be one that is more balanced that the one I’ve come from.